Jamie Thomson - Dark Lord: The Teenage Years - Hachette Children's Group

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    • ISBN:9781408316559
    • Publication date:06 Oct 2011
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Dark Lord: The Teenage Years

Book 1

By Jamie Thomson

  • Paperback
  • £6.99

Winner of the 2012 Roald Dahl Funny Prize!

Thirteen-year-old schoolboy, Dirk Lloyd, has a dark secret - in fact he is a dark secret.

Winner of the 2012 Roald Dahl Funny Prize!

Thirteen-year-old schoolboy, Dirk Lloyd, has a dark secret - in fact he is a dark secret. Dirk - according to his own account - is the earthly incarnation of a Dark Lord, supreme ruler of the Darklands and leader of great armies of orcs and warriors, intent on destruction and bloody devastation. Following a colossal final battle between the forces of good and evil, the Dark Lord was defeated and hurled by his arch-foe's spells into the Pit of Uttermost Despair. At the bottom of the Pit lies...a supermarket car park in the municipal town of Whiteshields, somewhere in modern day England. And when he is found, and tries to explain that he is the Dark Lord, people think he means Dirk Lloyd. The fact that he's trapped in the puny body of a schoolboy doesn't help.
And so begins Dirk's battle to recover his dignity, his power, and his lands... Along the way he faces the inconvenience of being fostered by a do-gooding family, the Purejoies; the torture of endless hours of drudgery at the Whiteshields Brainwashing Centre (aka school); a vengeful Headmaster; two interfering Psychotic Persecutors (psychotherapists); and constant laughter and disrespect when he attempts to marshall his lackeys and lickspittles (friends) to do what he wants them to.

Dirk makes friends with the son of his foster family, Christopher, and the local Goth Girl, Sooz, and together they attempt to cast a spell that will transport Dirk back to his homeland. Inevitably, not everything goes to plan... But that's for book 2

Roald Dahl Prize winner, 2012.

Biographical Notes

Jamie Thomson is a British writer, editor and game developer. He is the author of numerous 'choose-your-own-adventure' gamebooks, and he also co-wrote three books for the Fighting Fantasy series.

  • Other details

  • ISBN: 9781408315118
  • Publication date: 09 Feb 2017
  • Page count: 352
  • Imprint: Orchard Books
A parody of fantasy media that will appeal to anyone who likes a laugh. (The Sunday Times' 100 Best Children's Books) — The Sunday Times
A parody of fantasy media that will appeal to anyone who likes a laugh. (The Sunday Times' 100 Best Children's Books) — The Sunday Times
Dark Lord is a wonderfully absurd take on beings from another planet — Michael Rosen, Roald Dahl Funny Prize judge
Very funny, very silly... brilliant concept. — Bookseller
One of the most original children's books of the year. — Daily Express
"CHILDREN'S BOOK OF THE WEEK" This funny book in the Fabled Lands series is based on an ingenious idea. — Sunday Times
Funny, utterly silly and enjoyable book, which lots of young readers will love. — Bookbag
Wonderfully original, completely mad. — Lovereading
It's funny-clever as well as funny-silly — Mel Giedroyc, Roald Dahl Funny Prize Judge 2012
A perfect novel for computer games-obsessed boys. — Sunday Telegraph
Laugh-out-loud funny and often touching. — Queens Park Books
Amazing, fantastic... great to read. — Skye Turnbull- 9 year old reviewer
Hilarious. — Chicklish
This is hilarious, and is set to have us inferior puny humans laughing out loud... It really is a work of 'evil genius'. — LiteraryLoves.com
Perfect deadpan humor... wickedly funny, brilliantly told stuff, and you'll never have more fun cheering for evil. — BoingBoing.net
Comic fantasy which won this year's Roald Dahl Funny Prize. — Sunday Express
There are lashings of fantasy and adventure but what makes Dark Lord tick is the humour. * * * * — Daily Telegraph
A funny, whacky, page-turning tale. — Good Book Guide
Laugh out loud funny and entertaining, with a surprisingly endearing central character: great fun. — East Anglian Daily Times
Orchard Books

Headmaster of Doom

Jamie Thomson
Authors:
Jamie Thomson

Dirk Lloyd, the Dark Lord trapped in the boy of a weedy schoolboy, returns in a darkly hilarious adventure set in the most ghoulish school you'll encounter this side of the Darklands ...Fourth in the brilliant series that began with the Roald Dahl Funny Prize-winning DARK LORD: THE TEENAGE YEARS, also chosen as one of the Sunday Times's 100 Modern Children Classics.Perfect for fans of Philip Reeve and David Walliams.

Orchard Books

A Galaxy Too Far

Jamie Thomson
Authors:
Jamie Thomson

Harry was just an ordinary teenage boy from Croydon when he was abducted by aliens and accidentally became the captain of their starship. His quest to get back home to Earth continues - but now he's acquired an alien 'son' and a new spacecraft, and he's being pursued by an eight-foot robot bounty hunter...Could this be a galaxy too far for Harry?Another hilarious story from the Roald Dahl Funny Prize-winning author of the DARK LORD series.

Orchard Books

The Wrong Side of the Galaxy

Jamie Thomson
Authors:
Jamie Thomson
Orchard Books

Eternal Detention

Jamie Thomson
Authors:
Jamie Thomson
Orchard Books

Selena the Sleepover Fairy

Daisy Meadows, Georgie Ripper
Contributors:
Daisy Meadows, Georgie Ripper
Orchard Books

Poppy the Piano Fairy

Daisy Meadows, Georgie Ripper
Contributors:
Daisy Meadows, Georgie Ripper

The Music Fairies desperately need Rachel's and Kirsty's help! Jack Frost and his naughty goblins have stolen the fairies' Magical Musical Instruments, which means that music is being ruined for everyone! Jack Frost plans to use the instruments to help him win a national talent competition in the human world, and with the help of the enchanted instruments, he's bound to win. If this happens, humans will find out about Fairyland and then all the fairies will be in danger! Poppy the Piano Fairy needs Rachel's and Kirsty's help to find her Magic Piano. But how will they outwit Jack Frost and his goblin henchmen...?

Orchard Books

Ellie the Guitar Fairy

Daisy Meadows, Georgie Ripper
Contributors:
Daisy Meadows, Georgie Ripper

The Music Fairies desperately need Rachel's and Kirsty's help! Jack Frost and his naughty goblins have stolen the fairies' Magical Musical Instruments, which means that music is being ruined for everyone! Jack Frost plans to use the instruments to help him win a national talent competition in the human world, and with the help of the enchanted instruments, he's bound to win. If this happens, humans will find out about Fairyland and then all the fairies will be in danger! Ellie the Guitar Fairy needs Rachel's and Kirsty's help to find her Magic Guitar. They must come up with a plan to to take it back from the sneaky goblins...

Orchard Books

Fiona the Flute Fairy

Daisy Meadows, Georgie Ripper
Contributors:
Daisy Meadows, Georgie Ripper

The Music Fairies desperately need Rachel's and Kirsty's help! Jack Frost and his naughty goblins have stolen the fairies' Magical Musical Instruments, which means that music is being ruined for everyone! Jack Frost plans to use the instruments to help him win a national talent competition in the human world, and with the help of the enchanted instruments, he's bound to win. If this happens, humans will find out about Fairyland and then all the fairies will be in danger! Fiona the Flute Fairy needs Rachel's and Kirsty's help to track down her Magic Flute...

Orchard Books

Maya the Harp Fairy

Daisy Meadows, Georgie Ripper
Contributors:
Daisy Meadows, Georgie Ripper
Orchard Books

Victoria the Violin Fairy

Daisy Meadows, Georgie Ripper
Contributors:
Daisy Meadows, Georgie Ripper

The Music Fairies desperately need Rachel's and Kirsty's help! Jack Frost and his naughty goblins have stolen the fairies' Magical Musical Instruments, which means that music is being ruined for everyone! Jack Frost plans to use the instruments to help him win a national talent competition in the human world, and with the help of the enchanted instruments, he's bound to win. If this happens, humans will find out about Fairyland and then all the fairies will be in danger! Victoria must find her violin - how can Rachel and Kirsty help her?

Orchard Books

Tamara the Tooth Fairy

Daisy Meadows, Georgie Ripper
Contributors:
Daisy Meadows, Georgie Ripper

When Jack Frost steals her magic items in an attempt to ward off toothache, Tamara the Tooth Fairy is no longer able to collect teeth from beneath children's pillows! But as ever, Kirsty and Rachel are eager to help. Can they find all three missing objects - and persuade Jack Frost to go to the dentist?

Orchard Books

Helena the Horseriding Fairy

Daisy Meadows, Georgie Ripper
Contributors:
Daisy Meadows, Georgie Ripper

The Sporty Fairies are in need of Rachel and Kirsty's help. Everyone in Fairyland is preparing for the Fairy Olympics, but Jack Frost and his goblins have stolen the magic sporty items so they can win by cheating! What's more, with the items missing, everyone in the human world is playing sports really badly, and so the human Olympics is in danger of being ruined too! Gemma's Magic Ribbon is the last item that Rachel and Kirsty must rescue to ensure the Olympics, both in Fairyland and the human world, will go ahead smoothly. But how can they get it back from Jack Frost?

Orchard Books

Francesca the Football Fairy

Daisy Meadows, Georgie Ripper
Contributors:
Daisy Meadows, Georgie Ripper

The Sporty Fairies are in need of Rachel and Kirsty's help. Everyone in Fairyland is preparing for the Fairy Olympics, but Jack Frost and his goblins have stolen the magic sporty items so they can win by cheating! What's more, with the items missing, everyone in the human world is playing sports really badly, and so the human Olympics is in danger of being ruined too! Francesca needs the girls' help to get her Magic Football back...

Orchard Books

Alice the Tennis Fairy

Daisy Meadows, Georgie Ripper
Contributors:
Daisy Meadows, Georgie Ripper

The Sporty Fairies are in need of Rachel and Kirsty's help. Everyone in Fairyland is preparing for the Fairy Olympics, but Jack Frost and his goblins have stolen the magic sporty items so they can win by cheating! What's more, with the items missing, everyone in the human world is playing sports really badly, and so the human Olympics is in danger of being ruined too! Rachel and Kirsty love playing tennis, but with Alice's Magic Tennis Ball missing, they can't seem to hit one shot! The girls must help Alice find the goblins before it's too late...

Orchard Books

Kylie the Carnival Fairy

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Yasmin the Night Owl Fairy

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Danni the Drum Fairy

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Sadie the Saxophone Fairy

Daisy Meadows, Georgie Ripper
Contributors:
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The Music Fairies desperately need Rachel's and Kirsty's help! Jack Frost and his naughty goblins have stolen the fairies' Magical Musical Instruments, which means that music is being ruined for everyone! Jack Frost plans to use the instruments to help him win a national talent competition in the human world, and with the help of the enchanted instruments, he's bound to win. If this happens, humans will find out about Fairyland and then all the fairies will be in danger! Sadie's Magic Saxophone is in the hands of the troublesome goblins. Can Rachel and Kirsty help her to outwit them and take the instrument back?

Orchard Books

Zoe the Skating Fairy

Daisy Meadows, Georgie Ripper
Contributors:
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Samantha the Swimming Fairy

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Contributors:
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The Sporty Fairies are in need of Rachel and Kirsty's help. Everyone in Fairyland is preparing for the Fairy Olympics, but Jack Frost and his goblins have stolen the magic sporty items so they can win by cheating! What's more, with the items missing, everyone in the human world is playing sports really badly, and so the human Olympics is in danger of being ruined too! Samantha the Swimming Fairy is desperate to get her Magic Goggles backs from the goblins - can Rachel and Kirsty help?